What happens when you submit your plans to the Lord? He opens your heart for more than you thought you could handle or imagine. Sometimes that takes years, sometimes it takes only days.
This adoption journey has taken both.
We learned from others who've been down this adoption road that the journey is a lot of waiting. But then, seemingly out of the blue, waiting turns into rushing. And possibly then some more waiting.
• One day we were waiting for an adoption with an unknown timeframe.
• The next day we received a phone call from Bethany Christian Services asking us if we would be open to consider taking in a foster child, with the possibility of adoption. We prayed, and we listened.
• That week we learned more about the child's case and needs; felt God asking us to keep going.
• At the end of that week we met our foster son for lunch, and took him home the next day for a sleepover weekend.
• The following weekend he graced our home with his abundant smile, excitement, and need for consistent love and affirmation that everything is going to be ok – "God's got your back."
So there we were swarming around doing errands, final preps in our home for safety and to make him feel at home, planning summer camps and care, telling work my time off that I've saved up is going to be used quicker than we thought, asking family and friends to cover all of us in prayer, and beginning the meetings with case workers, therapists, and research on how to parent children with his background.
We are now five and a half weeks in after our foster son moved in and we know we are right where we are
meant to be. I knew there would be ups and downs of course, but I'm not
sure I realized how up and down a day in itself could be. My four weeks
off with the boys has helped transitions, established routines,
boundaries, and expectations of behavior so I'm thankful I had that
time. The days are getting better as far as anger response, but a lot of
what we taught seems to have gone in one ear and out the other – we
have to remind ourselves that habits may have been established long
before we met though. Overall, our boys are getting along well and we're
all learning each day.
Raising two boys is fun. I get my fill of creature hunts, rock and stick collections, explorative hikes, wrestling tickle matches and discovering them high up somewhere, usually in a tree or at the top of the stairs daring a jump to prove how tough they are. The hard part of parenting our foster child, whose last seven years we haven't known, is reaching the heart and making a difference despite the storms inside.
We know anger is pain in disguise – but children don't see it that way. Instead they live in the present while we help them heal from their past. So while every home-cooked meal may seem unappealing to our foster son who refuses to eat because it simply looks different; or if there's competition driven by jealousy in rewards earned or in a game our boys are playing; or in the pride that rises up in a young child so much so that he can't ask for something in a kind manner or be respectful because deep down he sees that as losing control; or when the storms inside are expressed through angry words to hurt those who desire to help you, we must remain patient. Patient with unending love, stability, and safety because they are key in helping him heal over time. Some children only need families for a little while, some need them for longer - whatever our season is with him we choose to love. It heals eventually. We hang on to that to get us through the tougher moments.
These nearly daily anger outbursts seem to be over little mundane issues - like what's fair, what's right, and if a child only cares about himself then what he gets or doesn't get is all that matters to him. But we know he has the unfortunate
addition of former unhealthy relationships, deep losses a child shouldn't ever have to experience, and the ongoing pain that is related to all
of it. But we also believe in the Lord who is above all and can
overcome anything we cannot even imagine possible!
Though we know God is walking beside us in this, we question our parenting – are we doing this right? Are we getting through? Does he know we love him unconditionally when we say we do, and does he believe it?
A friend shared with me that, "The Word of God is the only
word that can change hopelessness into hope, hurt into healing, and
distrust into a full embrace. Pray God's Word out loud over Him every
day. God's Word can rescue his little heart!" What tremendous wisdom.
In the storms, there's real peace knowing you're where God wants you though there are many unknowns. Our Lord has a big picture heart – I'll keep hanging my heart on that so that our peace will remain.
Our summer so far has been full of activity: from nature camp where the boys get to stomp in creeks, discover the stars that God created, and cook biscuits using solar energy, to a camp taking care of animals who need a family to adopt them into their home, to a week of VBS (we listen to the CD every day in the car – yay!?), trips to the library, nearby parks, and times with friends and family at the pool and in the home. I hope these days don't pass in the heart of our boys – I hope these days are treasured memories, but more than that, times where our foster son can draw from as he grows into a young man. I hope these times will be etched into his heart as he remembers unconditional love and safety can exist in a family and within a relationship with God.
I pray that these days are making a difference. Sometimes it takes years, sometimes it takes only days.
We are a family of four (one soon-to-be adopted son in addition to our bio son), plus a great dog, and praying for more, children that is. This is our journey.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Welcome home!
Monday, May 7, 2012
Orphan Care as a biblical mandate
God is amazing. Can I get an Amen?! He works in mysterious ways. Yah - you can second that. He has placed several people in our path since we began this journey, who were already in our path, we just didn't know it yet.
1. First we met a couple who we've since become friends with, in our state-approved training classes we took in October 2011. We were looking for a church home and already had it in our calendar to visit this particular church the following Sunday when we struck up conversation with a couple in the same class. They were already members at the church we had planned on visiting and invited us to their Sunday School class. Months later, we felt God's leading our family to that church and joined.
2. We met another couple in another adoption training class, who our adoption specialist introduced us to. They were young and lived in our area - AND we discovered we all go to the same church. We have since met for lunch as families and learned that we all share the same heart to begin an orphan care ministry in our church.
So, we have plans to meet with our pastor in a week to discuss the possibilities of raising awareness in our church body of God's mandate to care for the orphan. We know not all people feel called to adopt a child, but we all can work together as believers to support and show Christ's love to the fatherless and point the next generation to Christ. Whether you are part of the ALL, the MANY, or the FEW, we can all do something ... My friend Jennifer Dove shared with me what Johnny Carr of Bethany Christian Services has taught her:
The ALL can pray.
The MANY can get involved meeting practical needs or volunteer.
The FEW can move forward as God leads to be a safe family, a foster home, or adopt.
• Begin praying today what role God has for you in loving his children.
•Ask the Lord how you can glorify him with the blessings and resources you've been given (it's all His, remember?)
• If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, who are you - the all, the many, or the few? We could use all hands on deck!
1. First we met a couple who we've since become friends with, in our state-approved training classes we took in October 2011. We were looking for a church home and already had it in our calendar to visit this particular church the following Sunday when we struck up conversation with a couple in the same class. They were already members at the church we had planned on visiting and invited us to their Sunday School class. Months later, we felt God's leading our family to that church and joined.
2. We met another couple in another adoption training class, who our adoption specialist introduced us to. They were young and lived in our area - AND we discovered we all go to the same church. We have since met for lunch as families and learned that we all share the same heart to begin an orphan care ministry in our church.
So, we have plans to meet with our pastor in a week to discuss the possibilities of raising awareness in our church body of God's mandate to care for the orphan. We know not all people feel called to adopt a child, but we all can work together as believers to support and show Christ's love to the fatherless and point the next generation to Christ. Whether you are part of the ALL, the MANY, or the FEW, we can all do something ... My friend Jennifer Dove shared with me what Johnny Carr of Bethany Christian Services has taught her:
The ALL can pray.
The MANY can get involved meeting practical needs or volunteer.
The FEW can move forward as God leads to be a safe family, a foster home, or adopt.
• Begin praying today what role God has for you in loving his children.
•Ask the Lord how you can glorify him with the blessings and resources you've been given (it's all His, remember?)
• If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, who are you - the all, the many, or the few? We could use all hands on deck!
Prayers while we wait for a match
| 115,000 children in the U.S. foster-care system are waiting for permanent, loving families. Some children need a home for just a little while, while some need for a bit longer, and others need someone to raise them for majority of their little lives into being strong, independent, and God-fearing adults. As Christians, our mandate from God is to love all His little children, to point them all to Christ, and to raise up the next generation for His glory. All of these miracles from God have a planned purpose in this world. Some can't see past their circumstances without a loving parent gently guiding them to the healing, restoration, and hope we find in Jesus Christ. Don't they all deserve that chance? I know if I wasn't privileged to grow up in a healthy and safe Christian home I would hope someone would have picked me up along the way and shown me the opportunity of new life.
James 1:27 "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."
Isaiah 1:16-17 "Wash and make yourselves clean. Take your evil deeds out of my sight; stop doing wrong. Learn to do right; seek justice. Defend the oppressed.Take up the cause of the fatherless;
plead the case of the widow."
Psalm 68:5-6 "A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.
Deuteronomy 10:18 "He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the foreigner residing among you, giving them food and clothing."
As we move through the waiting period of being matched with a child(ren) that the professional specialists and case workers deem a good fit for all, we continue and pray through what God's direction is for us. We are thankful He has opened our hearts to love a child that needs a safe and healthy family, a child who has not come from my wound, but is already growing in our hearts. We don't know the name, age, sex, race, or background he/she has found themselves in, but we are already here - praying for this/these child(ren): • that their hearts be tender to the Lord's working in their lives • hearts soft to our loving correction • able to forgive those who have treated them poorly in their past • able to love and trust in future relationships • for excitement to be a part of another family (for some, they have had multiple [4-14 homes] foster families before a permanent family can be identified) • for their ability to adjust to our lives (school, church, home, lifestyle) • for Steve, myself, Brayden's and our immediate family's hearts to be tender to accept their good and bad days, to know how to nurture and how to lovingly correct in a way that they understand we want what's best for them, and be in support of us as a family, no matter what. • for our church body to support us and be a second family to this child who may not know what family should look like The prayers go on and on ... Today we meet with our adoption specialist as we discuss the history of a particular child which we have been identified for. Here we are, again, being stretched as we consider opening up our hearts to the possibility of only being in a child's life for a season, and hopefully longer. The child is currently in need of a foster home that is willing to work toward permanency if the parent's rights are in fact terminated; the system has labeled this case high risk since there's a high risk a family member may step up to the plate and adopt the child. At the beginning of our journey I didn't think I could handle parenting a child only for a season, but God continues to open my heart and show me that I can - through His strength. Of course, if the best for the child is to be in our home permanently, then that's what we will pray for. If it's God's will for the child to be permanently adopted into our family, the process could take a year's time and by March/April 2013 we could officially have another child added to our family. Until then, we pray for God's clarity as we move forward. With the little bit we have learned so far about this particular child we feel strong about the opportunity and excited too! We feel we can support the needs of the child concerning what we have learned this far. If after today's meeting we feel led to move further then we plan to meet with the child's case worker by the end of this week to learn all there is to know about the child's history and current needs. If at that time we feel God's continuing to move us forward, then placement in our home would happen quickly, as a foster situation. My heart has been so widened for so many children we wouldn't have known about unless we were in this process. There's the caucasian teenage mother we met six months ago on the side of the road at night I now pray for often. There's the african-american child we looked into just a few weeks ago that we learned we couldn't fully support his needs. He still needs a home that can give him complete and full undivided attention for a lifetime - a boy who has a great big smile, personality, and desire to have a family who can help him despite the destructive background he knows - I pray for him nearly every day. There's the teenage mother who considered us as a potential adoptive family for her bi-racial baby who she just had this month. She decided to keep her baby and we are thankful she has Christian support around her as she steps into motherhood. And now, there's this bi-racial child who we are looking further into today to share our home and hearts as foster parents. We welcome every opportunity pray for each of these beautiful children of God as we spread our heart's wings wider and wider. Everything is yours God. |
Monday, April 23, 2012
The Process of Waiting
We have been identified as a potential family for an older child just
two weeks ago, for the first time since we've been approved by our
state. We had to determine if we could effectively parent and resource
the child's extreme behavior and special needs. As we looked into the
paperwork on this particular child's needs we stretched ourselves, our
expectations, and the resources we know are available to us. We pictured
the day-to-day reality of parenting a child for the long-haul and
possibly a lifetime. The needs were far beyond what we feel capable to
handle. We know we must also consider protecting the family we have
established in our home already. We prayed, our trusted prayer warriors
prayed, and we couldn't get a definitive yes from the Lord.
Our hearts are burdened by the tremendous need we have for the orphan because the world depends on itself, rather than our faithful God, and we've made a mess of ourselves. We know the Lord has a plan for each and everyone of us. But questions continually dart through our minds as we pray for a child(ren) we have never met – and possibly never will.
• Maybe God gave us this opportunity so that we can pray for a child who doesn't have anyone lifting them up in prayer?
• Perhaps God's plans are to test our faith and see how dependent we will allow ourselves to become until we are fully surrendered?
• Maybe it's to open our eyes and hearts to the desperate need we have to care for those who need a permanent family?
• Maybe it's an opportunity to discover information and digest the research we feed ourselves in the process?
• Why are people who have such evil in their hearts blessed with the birth of children?
• If we say yes to one child, we'd be saying no to another. What about the others? What other Christian families are going to step up and give the opportunity to thrive to a child who has no control over their circumstance?
Through out this process, Steve and I have tried to be aware of what the situation could look like from other perspectives. We have moved from just considering how a child will impact our lives, to what are they thinking about all of this? We have pictured what a similar scenario would be if we had had the adopted child biologically? How would this change our perspectives? I know if I were to get pregnant today, that we are not promised a child who will bond with us, or be an angel. And we aren't looking for the perfect child to join our family and add to their lives. Let's say I unknowingly had a little hellion (I've never tried spelling that word before) in my wound. As parents, are we not still committed to raise that child the best way we know how, to lean on God, others, and resources in helping them be who God has created them to be? Yes. When you decide to build your family biologically, are you not making some of your choices in blind faith – that God will provide, direct, and clean up our messes? Yes. What's the difference? Why is it so hard for people to grasp the same level of faith and commitment for a child who doesn't have someone to simply spend time with them and give them the opportunity to thrive? To a child who may never have had someone sit down with them and simply read them a book, ask them how their day went, or care when they are hurt and let them be free to express that while showing them how to do so in a healthy way?
We recently went to a meeting at Bethany Christian Services where they had foster-to-adopt and adoptive families share their stories. One older couple shared a touching moment they had immediately after adopting an older child who was near 17 (children age out of adoption at 18 yo). The girl immediately started calling her adoptive mom "Mommy," acknowledging she was a little too old to call her that name, but she had always desired to have a family, particularly a mommy. Now that she had one, she felt no embarrassment in showing that affection in her given name. So many kids desire a family so badly and they don't understand why they still wait.
My mother-in-love, who is a woman full of faith and a strong prayer warrior, gave us a picture of how she has seen God work in her life. She said sometimes the Lord asks you to move to Maryland, but he doesn't give you an address. Other times, he tells you exactly what house to move into. Could it be the same way for adoption? We know the Lord has called us to adopt as we add to our family. And although we trust He knows the child(ren) He has for us, will he direct us clearly to a child(ren) specifically? Both paths are dependent on us stretching our faith in the Lord's leading.
Our hearts are burdened by the tremendous need we have for the orphan because the world depends on itself, rather than our faithful God, and we've made a mess of ourselves. We know the Lord has a plan for each and everyone of us. But questions continually dart through our minds as we pray for a child(ren) we have never met – and possibly never will.
• Maybe God gave us this opportunity so that we can pray for a child who doesn't have anyone lifting them up in prayer?
• Perhaps God's plans are to test our faith and see how dependent we will allow ourselves to become until we are fully surrendered?
• Maybe it's to open our eyes and hearts to the desperate need we have to care for those who need a permanent family?
• Maybe it's an opportunity to discover information and digest the research we feed ourselves in the process?
• Why are people who have such evil in their hearts blessed with the birth of children?
• If we say yes to one child, we'd be saying no to another. What about the others? What other Christian families are going to step up and give the opportunity to thrive to a child who has no control over their circumstance?
Through out this process, Steve and I have tried to be aware of what the situation could look like from other perspectives. We have moved from just considering how a child will impact our lives, to what are they thinking about all of this? We have pictured what a similar scenario would be if we had had the adopted child biologically? How would this change our perspectives? I know if I were to get pregnant today, that we are not promised a child who will bond with us, or be an angel. And we aren't looking for the perfect child to join our family and add to their lives. Let's say I unknowingly had a little hellion (I've never tried spelling that word before) in my wound. As parents, are we not still committed to raise that child the best way we know how, to lean on God, others, and resources in helping them be who God has created them to be? Yes. When you decide to build your family biologically, are you not making some of your choices in blind faith – that God will provide, direct, and clean up our messes? Yes. What's the difference? Why is it so hard for people to grasp the same level of faith and commitment for a child who doesn't have someone to simply spend time with them and give them the opportunity to thrive? To a child who may never have had someone sit down with them and simply read them a book, ask them how their day went, or care when they are hurt and let them be free to express that while showing them how to do so in a healthy way?
We recently went to a meeting at Bethany Christian Services where they had foster-to-adopt and adoptive families share their stories. One older couple shared a touching moment they had immediately after adopting an older child who was near 17 (children age out of adoption at 18 yo). The girl immediately started calling her adoptive mom "Mommy," acknowledging she was a little too old to call her that name, but she had always desired to have a family, particularly a mommy. Now that she had one, she felt no embarrassment in showing that affection in her given name. So many kids desire a family so badly and they don't understand why they still wait.
My mother-in-love, who is a woman full of faith and a strong prayer warrior, gave us a picture of how she has seen God work in her life. She said sometimes the Lord asks you to move to Maryland, but he doesn't give you an address. Other times, he tells you exactly what house to move into. Could it be the same way for adoption? We know the Lord has called us to adopt as we add to our family. And although we trust He knows the child(ren) He has for us, will he direct us clearly to a child(ren) specifically? Both paths are dependent on us stretching our faith in the Lord's leading.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Ethiopia and feet to the ground
Sometime soon I'm going to come back and add to this post about our trip to Ethiopia, which we took in June 2011. It was our first international trip together and though we didn't understand why we were asked to be a part of the team at first since we had absolutely no adoption experience other than an open heart to love the orphaned be willing to follow when God moves, it proved to be part of God's plan to help us open our hearts even more so that we could return home and put feet to our heart's words.
We traveled with two great families – both who have experienced adoption themselves. One family has seen God's hand in two international adoptions; the other couple has been blessed with two domestic adoptions; and then there was us – the couple who was 'thinking' about adoption, but hadn't really started the first step. God still used us though and he worked through the two couples in our lives on that week-long trip. Between walking the plane aisles to stretch our legs, go the restroom, or catch a glimpse of the sunset on the 12-hour trip, both of our new friends answered our ga-zillion questions on both domestic and international adoption with a smile. And I even finished an entire book, Adopted For Life by Russell D. Moore, on the way there.
We had been studying the Bible looking for all the scripture and stories of adoption of God's people and his command for us to follow his model. We met as a team to go over the plan for our day-long meetings we were going to have with local church leaders and interested Christian families who were thinking of stepping up and fostering.
You think we were only preparing to encourage and show God's command to the Ethiopian families? No, God was surely prepping us as well for many blessings to come ... if we were ready to surrender.
We traveled with two great families – both who have experienced adoption themselves. One family has seen God's hand in two international adoptions; the other couple has been blessed with two domestic adoptions; and then there was us – the couple who was 'thinking' about adoption, but hadn't really started the first step. God still used us though and he worked through the two couples in our lives on that week-long trip. Between walking the plane aisles to stretch our legs, go the restroom, or catch a glimpse of the sunset on the 12-hour trip, both of our new friends answered our ga-zillion questions on both domestic and international adoption with a smile. And I even finished an entire book, Adopted For Life by Russell D. Moore, on the way there.
We had been studying the Bible looking for all the scripture and stories of adoption of God's people and his command for us to follow his model. We met as a team to go over the plan for our day-long meetings we were going to have with local church leaders and interested Christian families who were thinking of stepping up and fostering.
You think we were only preparing to encourage and show God's command to the Ethiopian families? No, God was surely prepping us as well for many blessings to come ... if we were ready to surrender.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
God pointing the way
Well, already a lot has changed on our path as we started this seemingly long road to expanding our family. As I shared in my first post we hit quite a few road blocks at the beginning as we took in all the resourcing, agency information, and personal experiences from others.
• We went from being discouraged at various agency meetings because:
- Most christian agencies wouldn't let us consider adoption of a domestic newborn or international adoption for our family until we have been married five years (currently going on three)
- Secular agencies didn't seem to hear our hearts when we spoke of our faith on this journey. We attended an info. meeting at one agency where we were one of two couples that were in a heterosexual relationship where we felt like no one "got" us.
- We began a homestudy with a local agency who's approved to do only the homestudy portion, meaning when complete we'd be on our own searching for a birth parent match. In our visits with this agency, we didn't have solid feelings in working with them as they seemed to just want our money. They were very discouraging to where we felt our hearts were being directed to take in an older child. I am generally tough when it comes to expressing my feelings to strangers - and the professional counselor this particular agency pointed us to was so harsh and made me cry as soon as I survived the hour long phone call of her telling us what is best for our family, despite where we feel God calling, and she hadn't even met us on paper or in person.
- And alas, one day something told me to check back with the Christian agency we first were interested in to see if they would work with a second-marriage couple if we were open to an older child. Bethany Christian Services DOES partner with the state in older child adoptions and we fit their specifications! We were so relieved, but also curious as to why we hadn't learned this route at our first info. meeting with them over a year ago. At the first meeting a year ago I guess the focus was only on domestic newborn and international adoption which we don't fit their specifications ... yet. So we closed our homestudy with the previous agency and began a new process with BCC for a domestic older child adoption.
• Soon after we said yes to God's calling to adopt, we learned that doctors say we may not be able to also have children together biologically. Wow. I can tell you this could be devastating to most, but because we had already known God has led us to adoption and he is in control, we were able to take in this new information with hope. As we continued the homestudy we also chose to continue meeting with fertility specialists to discover whatever issues health-wise we are dealing with. A year and many tests later, we have it figured out and we are simply trusting God for complete healing and a miracle if that is his plan. Though recently we learned that if we were to get pregnant we would have to halt the adoption process until our bio child is a year old. Wow – how do non-believers handle all of these unknown factors when they don't have the Lord to surrender all of their hopes, fears, and worries to? We trust that if God chooses to give us a miracle by adoption first, then that is his great plan. We trust that if God chooses to give us a miracle biologically that is also his great plan. Let all the details be in his hands. We ultimately want to experience both, but the law doesn't allow us to do both at the same time. So, we continue down the adoption road and trust it to our Lord.
Since we discovered where the open door was for our family, it has been a smooth process full of confirmation and blessing. We now have completed our homestudy with our adoption specialist at Bethany who was wonderful by the way, and are awaiting our state's final stamp on it - which should be 45 days max.
So, here we are – eighteen months later from when we first took the obedient step to care for the fatherless and we are so thrilled.
Our eyes and hearts have been widened since then – through personal experiences of lending a helping hand to single mothers or an assaulted teen on the side of the road needing help at midnight and daytime; through attending support meetings for adoptive families and adoptees at local churches; through reading and more reading of various books and articles; through continued prayer for both our family and the child as God prepares and protects us all; through being able to share with family and friends our story and calling; and through being shown new opportunities to pray for those on the other side of this journey.
I hope to be able to write about more updates sooner than later this time.
Patiently waiting for the Lord's timing, together.
Until the next update ...
• We went from being discouraged at various agency meetings because:
- Most christian agencies wouldn't let us consider adoption of a domestic newborn or international adoption for our family until we have been married five years (currently going on three)
- Secular agencies didn't seem to hear our hearts when we spoke of our faith on this journey. We attended an info. meeting at one agency where we were one of two couples that were in a heterosexual relationship where we felt like no one "got" us.
- We began a homestudy with a local agency who's approved to do only the homestudy portion, meaning when complete we'd be on our own searching for a birth parent match. In our visits with this agency, we didn't have solid feelings in working with them as they seemed to just want our money. They were very discouraging to where we felt our hearts were being directed to take in an older child. I am generally tough when it comes to expressing my feelings to strangers - and the professional counselor this particular agency pointed us to was so harsh and made me cry as soon as I survived the hour long phone call of her telling us what is best for our family, despite where we feel God calling, and she hadn't even met us on paper or in person.
- And alas, one day something told me to check back with the Christian agency we first were interested in to see if they would work with a second-marriage couple if we were open to an older child. Bethany Christian Services DOES partner with the state in older child adoptions and we fit their specifications! We were so relieved, but also curious as to why we hadn't learned this route at our first info. meeting with them over a year ago. At the first meeting a year ago I guess the focus was only on domestic newborn and international adoption which we don't fit their specifications ... yet. So we closed our homestudy with the previous agency and began a new process with BCC for a domestic older child adoption.
• Soon after we said yes to God's calling to adopt, we learned that doctors say we may not be able to also have children together biologically. Wow. I can tell you this could be devastating to most, but because we had already known God has led us to adoption and he is in control, we were able to take in this new information with hope. As we continued the homestudy we also chose to continue meeting with fertility specialists to discover whatever issues health-wise we are dealing with. A year and many tests later, we have it figured out and we are simply trusting God for complete healing and a miracle if that is his plan. Though recently we learned that if we were to get pregnant we would have to halt the adoption process until our bio child is a year old. Wow – how do non-believers handle all of these unknown factors when they don't have the Lord to surrender all of their hopes, fears, and worries to? We trust that if God chooses to give us a miracle by adoption first, then that is his great plan. We trust that if God chooses to give us a miracle biologically that is also his great plan. Let all the details be in his hands. We ultimately want to experience both, but the law doesn't allow us to do both at the same time. So, we continue down the adoption road and trust it to our Lord.
Since we discovered where the open door was for our family, it has been a smooth process full of confirmation and blessing. We now have completed our homestudy with our adoption specialist at Bethany who was wonderful by the way, and are awaiting our state's final stamp on it - which should be 45 days max.
So, here we are – eighteen months later from when we first took the obedient step to care for the fatherless and we are so thrilled.
Our eyes and hearts have been widened since then – through personal experiences of lending a helping hand to single mothers or an assaulted teen on the side of the road needing help at midnight and daytime; through attending support meetings for adoptive families and adoptees at local churches; through reading and more reading of various books and articles; through continued prayer for both our family and the child as God prepares and protects us all; through being able to share with family and friends our story and calling; and through being shown new opportunities to pray for those on the other side of this journey.
I hope to be able to write about more updates sooner than later this time.
Patiently waiting for the Lord's timing, together.
Until the next update ...
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